an After abortion

3,400 confidential and totally free groups to call and go to in the U.S...1,400 outside the U.S. . . . 98 of these in Canada.
Free, financial help given to women and families in need.More help given to women, families.
Helping with mortgage payments and more.More help.
The $1,950 need has been met!CPCs help women with groceries, clothing, cribs, "safe haven" places.
Help for those whose babies haveDown Syndrome and Other Birth Defects.
CALL 1-888-510-BABY or click on the picture on the left, if you gave birth or are about to and can't care for your baby, to give your baby to a worker at a nearby hospital (some states also include police stations or fire stations), NO QUESTIONS ASKED. YOU WON'T GET IN ANY TROUBLE or even have to tell your name; Safehaven people will help the baby be adopted and cared for.

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Freedom on the Fourth?

"Till selfish gain no longer stain,
The banner of the free!"
Happened across this on Youtube quite by accident. Brought tears to my eyes, for several reasons. The gravestone and soldier scenes in particular.

But I wept also because we here at the blog are all wondering now, "Is it still 'the banner of the free'?" We have felt this to certain degrees awhile now, and more so today, that not all of us in this nation will be allowed by some others to have our same freedoms anymore. We now feel that some of us may be persecuted for the simple defense of what we still believe is everyone's right in this nation: freedom of religion. It's already happened, elsewhere as well as here. Forcing someone to go against their true belief in their legitimate religion—by a punishing action or by a damning coercion—is akin to forcing someone to behave straight when they're decidedly gay. Neither is right to do. And the former is codified in our founding documents as the polar opposite of what this flag, this nation, represented for our first 239 years.

And yet, isn't it what Jesus Christ Himself said could happen: "people [will] insult you, persecute you, [and] prevail against you in the public square, because of me."

"Amen." So be it.

We're also not the only ones who are unnerved by this development because of its eery similarity to the question of abortion:

"With a nod to the states and those millennia of tradition, [Supreme Court Justice] Kennedy and his liberal cohorts did exactly what the Burger court did in Roe v. Wade: silenced the voices of the opposition, bound the hands that would have cast votes in a referendum, put blindfolds on those who see dangers for people of faith.

"Because that is what they have to do."

How similar that sounds to "What you are going to do, do quickly."

But we're torn.

Torn, because of what our faith is for us, what our religious freedom means to us and to all those who value theirs as well—and what our friends and family who are, or were, gay, mean to us too.

I've lost two gay friends, one a high school classmate and dear friend, one a co-worker. These great guys lived out their gay lifestyle, but it killed them before they were 40.

Another long-ago coworker once shared with me she was lesbian. A sister of one of my best friends is lesbian; a brother of another best friend is gay. Two beloved recent/current coworkers and friends are gay. Two of my son's former college buddies are gay, and I am overjoyed to give them big bear hugs and catch up with them at alumni sporting events whenever we're all in town! It's like no time has passed at all since we first met. Emily and Joy have similar friendships and family members among the LGBT community.

One of my most favorite comedians of all time is self-described transvestite Eddie Izzard.

We love them all. Dearly. And we would never stop loving them, no matter what.

We don't "hate" LGBT folks. We don't "hate" anyone. And it is most certainly not ever our place, nor anyone's, Christian or not, to judge anyone else. We believe that's God's department.

We do hate what some false Christians have done to harshly maltreat those in the LGBT community. (Any community for that matter.) We hate that with a passion. We have hated that a long time.

We just fear now that "turnabout is fairplay" persecution could be visited on those of us (even some gays and lesbians included) who, for the right, personal reasons, believe that it is at odds with the salvation of our eternal souls, to engage in LGBT activity.

Two wrongs don't make a right, they say.

All three of us also know full well we are among the least ones to speak of faith or not abiding by it. We did a grievously awful thing, when we aborted our own children. I aborted what would have been my only daughter. It took 20 years to stop denying my shame and remorse, and now I have to live with the pain and grief of my horrific act the rest of my life. It's why we keep doing this blog as a safe place for those also feeling grief over their abortions to find the various recovery and support options, and to know they are by no means alone in their remorse.

And since I believe in a necessary purification after death in the state of being called "Purgatory", I will most definitely be first in line for spending some time there, if I am able to even be in a position to gain Heaven eventually. I will need all the prayers of the living I can get, then, I know far too well.

But now that five of the nine justices on the Supreme Court have decided, as the court did with the issue of abortion in 1973, that same-sex marriage is now legal in all 50 states—and this is a mere one justice less than those four who legally, intelligently disagreed—we fear that the United States Of America could go the way of Canada, and Spain, and even Washington DC, New Jersey, Georgia, California, Massachusetts, some to the point of requiring teaching children, even those home-schooled, lessons denouncing the religious beliefs held by some parents as "heterosexism."

We hope and pray that we who still believe we have a freedom of religion, not just our freedom of worship, will not be persecuted by some for the simple, unharming fact of believing or defending our faith.

A refresher for those who have the mistaken idea that "freedom of religion" equals just private "freedom of worship:"

  1. The first line of the First Amendment says,
    "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof."

    "The Free Exercise Clause reserves the right of American citizens to accept any religious belief and engage in religious rituals. The wording in the free-exercise clauses of state constitutions that religious [o]pinion, expression of opinion, and practice were all expressly protected” by the Free Exercise Clause.[1] The clause protects not just religious beliefs but actions made on behalf of those beliefs. More importantly, the wording of state constitutions suggest that “free exercise envisions religiously compelled exemptions from at least some generally applicable laws.”[2] The Free Exercise Clause not only protects religious belief and expression; it also seems to allow for violation of laws, as long as that violation is made for religious reasons." [emphasis this writer]

  2. Article 18 of the United Nations Universal Declaration of Human Rights, signed by the U.S.A. in 1948, states:
    "Everyone has the right to freedom of thought, conscience and religion; this right includes freedom to change his religion or belief, and freedom, either alone or in community with others and in public or private, to manifest his religion or belief in teaching, practice, worship and observance." [emphasis this writer]
Finally, we hope that all will consider what Christianity, true Christianity, is capable of, by the story of this would-be-Dylann-Roof-act-alike who credits the message of Jesus Christ with preventing him from taking that murderous racist path, and by the shining example of the Christian families of the nine Charleston Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church members slain by Dylann Roof, who forgave the murderer to his face at the hearing. They are true Christians. That's what true Christianity does for people. Love and forgiveness, not hate.

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

Sunday, March 8, 2015

Maybe We Spoke Too Soon

We thought we'd be back to (almost) daily posting again as of 2015. We really did!

We all have day-jobs (two jobs, in fact) but other stuff has recently cropped up to get in the way of doing what we want to do here. Suffice to say, we hope to have all that unforeseen extraneous stuff resolved, though it could take 2 to 6 months. So please bear with us. We here at Afterabortion blog do have reason to believe that satan and his buddies are working overtime to derail our efforts here--and many like us--to help other women like us, but the spiritual attacks won't succeed. (They never have before!) And we're still here, over a decade after we started. Some may think that a bit silly, talking like that, but we know, from experience, it is by no means an exaggeration. So while we're praying for anyone who lands here, please pray a little for us too. It's always gratefully appreciated. Thanks.

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

Saturday, February 14, 2015

Obi Wan Kenobi Could Have Been Aborted

Great true story here, about Alec Guinness and his single mom.

HT to Sheila Liaugminas at InforumBlog, who we didn't know till just now links to After Abortion blog. Thanks, Sheila, returning the favor...

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

Friday, February 13, 2015

Birth Defects...and Never Forgetting...

Welcome to all new and old visitors. Your anonymity is protected here. We don't go looking for who visits or from where, but it just wrenches our hearts when people find our blog from google searches like "How abortion never lets you forget" and "what birth defects can be cause by abortion?"

We are the sad messengers of information and answers to questons like that, only in hopes of helping others avoid our own pain, or heal from it, if you're already "there." There's lots of help, for both types of folks, found in these pages and links. The sidebar is a good place to start.

5 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

Thursday, February 12, 2015

"The only story is when a character plans to have an abortion and then changes her mind"

"The only story in it is when a character plans to have an abortion and then changes her mind," suggests Frost.

From a decidedly pro-choice 2014 article, "Breaking the taboo of abortion on TV and film".

A long discussion on how abortion is or is not portrayed, which goes to great, repeated pains to be sure to tell you, over and over, how this or that film or TV show will "dispel the myths" about abortion, as though the article's writer has the only lock on the truth of all abortions, everywhere, all the time. It's a little pat and a little strained-sounding, especially tipping the hand early by claiming (without linking to anything to substantiate) that one actress in a pro-choice film with an abortion in the plot was "subjected to online abuse from anti-choicers." I don't doubt that some who are not pro-choice can be verbally abusive, but let me/us judge that for ourselves rather than just take your or the actress' word for it, how about it?

For another taking on dispelling the myths about abortion, perhaps try here and take your pick.

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

"This is an attack on virtuous manhood and a celebration of bad choices by women."

Just in time for Valentine's Day, indeed.

I'm no prude, though by today's seeming (lack of) "standards," maybe I really am. And I'm sure I won't be apologizing for that.

But this obsession with "Fifty Shades Of Grey" just makes me ill, and the writer in that link couldn't have said it better:

"It is evidence of a damaged society, a nation that thinks it is just swell to celebrate the story of a predatory billionaire punk who victimizes a tragically vulnerable woman for his own sick entertainment...And what complements Valentine’s Day like the twisted story of an abusive relationship?"
Don't we have enough abuse and violence against women in this world? Even in this nation? Don't we have enough of women being forced to do things they don't want to do, really, when they are honest with themselves?

Do intelligent, self-sufficient women really get off on what's in that book and will be in this movie? Do men?? I sure don't. And I sure as hell don't want anything to do with any male (can't call him a "man") who, seriously or "for fun," raises a hand, a riding crop, or any object, to me. Beat me? Humiliate me? Not on your effin' life, buddy. I'm no idiot.

This kind of book/movie teaches women the absolutely wrongest of wrong things:

Count off the lessons from a film to be consumed by proud American women this weekend:

— Soulless sadism is hot.

— If the sadist is attractive and wealthy, his violent appetites will be met with approval.

— Such self-absorbed victimizers can force themselves on young, innocent women, and it is kind of awesome.

— Women should tolerate such sexual violence, even find a way to develop a taste for it. After all, maybe you can change him.

Excuse me while I go puke up a lung.

How can any woman who likes this drivel honestly hope or expect to get anywhere, to even try to earn dollar for dollar what men earn for the same quality and quantity of work, when you're willing to accept this kind of depravity as "good?"

Or to put it another way, do you think Hillary Clinton thinks this stuff is good for herself, or for any woman?

I'd bet not.

On the related subject of forcing women into submission of other kinds, a politician in my state, Rep. Alfred C. Adinolfi, R-Cheshire, has introduced a "bill titled 'Prevent Coerced Abortions' (H.B. 6193), which has been referred to the legislature's Judiciary Committee":


Be it enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives in General Assembly convened:

That the general statutes be amended to create criminal penalties for anyone who forces or coerces a woman to have an abortion, to require mandatory reporting of suspected forced or coerced abortions and to create civil penalties against employers, educational institutions, social assistance agencies or medical personnel who threaten a woman with the loss of employment or other opportunity for refusing to terminate her pregnancy.

Statement of Purpose:

To prevent the coercion of a woman to have an abortion.

It's sad that we have to even think about enacting a law to protect women from this, but it's a fact that we do. I strongly doubt, knowing my state, that it will become law however. At least, once Planned Parenthood and N.O.W. apply their pressures onto the politicians here.

In this Feb. 6 article in the Waterbury Republican-American, Bill O'Brien writes of "a 2007 case involving a 15-year-old Bloomfield girl who was missing for about a year until found by police in the West Hartford home of a 41-year-old man who had impregnated her and had her get an abortion at Planned Parenthood....[and last month] in Florida, a man was arrested after he allegedly used his car to try to run over his seven-months-pregnant girlfriend. Before the 'accident,' he reportedly asked her on the phone, 'Are you ready for your abortion date?'"

He also writes how "Homicide is one of the top three causes of death of pregnant women. On New Year's Eve in 2001, a Connecticut woman was shot and killed by her ex-boyfriend when she was eight and one-half months pregnant. That's an abortion by other means."

We've become desensitized. No, check that, we've desensitized ourselves.

George Will, in a recent column on the subject of why the economy isn't as rosy as we want to think it is, wrote this and it applies to the subject of "Fifty Shades of Grey" and to forced abortions as well:

Two phrases that [Democrat] Daniel Patrick Moynihan put into America’s political lexicon two decades ago are increasingly pertinent. They explain the insufficient dismay about recent economic numbers.

Moynihan said that when deviant behaviors — e.g., violent crime, or births to unmarried women — reach a certain level, society soothes itself by “defining deviancy down.” It de-stigmatizes the behaviors by declaring them normal.

Isn't that just what people are doing with this book and movie? Declaring it "normal?"

Isn't that just what people are doing when they learn of forced abortions? Declaring them normal, telling themselves that it just has to be the woman's choice, despite what they read in the media to the contrary?

Moynihan's second phrase has more to do with abortion in general, but it is this: "And sometimes, Moynihan said, social problems are the result of 'iatrogenic government.' In medicine, an iatrogenic ailment is inadvertently induced by a physician or medicine; in social policy, iatrogenic problems are caused by government."

Pro-choice folks are fond of repeating, "Keep the government out of our bedrooms!" But it was the Federal Government that inserted itself in our bedrooms in Roe v. Wade and Doe v. Bolton in the first place, declining to decide when human life begins, thus punting that question down the road and not allowing it to ever be answered in the public/political realm, though it scientifically has been answered since then but routinely ignored.

So, Moynihan was right again: the social problems of abortion, and in particular forced abortions, were caused by our Federal Government, the Supreme Court, and thus are iatrogenic problems.

And I dare anyone to stand up and say they think forced abortions are not a social problem. You are living under a rock, if you do.

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

Thursday, January 29, 2015

49% Say It's Immoral, Yet 51% Say Keep It Legal Anyway?

That's quite a disconnect between our consciences and our actions.

Pew Research has a few interesting facts and charts on how we view abortion these days.

"There’s a difference between what Americans think should be legal and what they think is moral. About half of Americans (49%) say that having an abortion is morally wrong, while 15% think it is morally acceptable and 23% say it is not a moral issue."

Yet "[w]hen asked directly about the legality of abortion, 51% of U.S. adults say it should be legal in all or most cases, compared to 43% who say it should be illegal all or most of the time."

"Roughly six-in-ten Americans (62%) know that Roe v. Wade was a decision about abortion, but among adults under 30 years old, only 44% know."

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Induced abortion and psychosexuality- a 2000 research study

J Psychosom Obstet Gynaecol. 2000 Dec;21(4):213-7.
Induced abortion and psychosexuality.
Bianchi-Demicheli F1, Kulier R, Perrin E, Campana A.


Little information exists on the impact of induced abortion on psychosexuality. Negative psychological effects and psychiatric complications due to termination of pregnancy seem to be rare. The objective of this study was to review the impact of induced abortion on sexuality and couple relationships. A systematic search of the literature was performed. Studies had to report a quantitative or qualitative evaluation of sexuality after pregnancy termination. Four studies were included. In the one prospective study using a control group, no difference in sexual functioning between groups after 1 year was reported. In the remaining observational studies, sexual dysfunction was reported in up to 30% of women after termination. Women undergoing abortion had significantly more conflicts in their partnerships. This was similar in all studies. Separation occurred in about one-quarter of all couples. Some studies report sexual dysfunction after termination of pregnancy. In about half of the couples separated after termination, abortion seemed not to have led to the separation. Psychological factors, together with relationship problems, might have played a role in failed contraception. The impact of induced abortion on sexuality needs to be studied in greater detail with rigorous methodology to draw firm conclusions.

PMID: 11191168 [PubMed - indexed for MEDLINE]

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

So Sad: Police Officer Hits Girlfriend After "Pushing Her To Have Abortion"

This is the true "war on women:"

North Charleston police officer accused of hitting girlfriend after abortion:

Shivers' girlfriend told deputies she was 10 weeks pregnant with Shivers' child and that he was pushing her to have an abortion. She said Shivers drove her from the hotel to the Charleston Women's Medical Center in West Ashley Saturday morning to get an abortion, then hit her in the face several times afterward because the procedure took so long, according to the report...A deputy noted that her left cheek appeared swollen.
Just one more on our running list of Forced Abortions.

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

"The ‘black lives matter’ slogan excludes the unborn"

From this article, "Aborting black America: The ‘black lives matter’ slogan excludes the unborn":
Ironically, black women used to suffer from breast cancer less frequently than white women. Not any longer. The Black Women’s Health Imperative notes that according to an American Cancer Society report, black women now develop breast cancer almost as frequently as whites, and are more likely to die from the disease. LifeSiteNews also cites an American Cancer Society report that black women under age 40 now are more likely to develop breast cancer than their white counterparts. They can thank Margaret Sanger [Planned Parenthood's founder] — and some of today’s so-called civil rights leaders.

Sanger relied on black ministers to act as Judas goats leading their sisters to abortion mills. According to LifeSiteNews, Sanger wrote in 1939, “We do not want the word to go out that we want to exterminate the Negro population, and the minister is the man who can straighten that idea out if it ever occurs to any of their more rebellious members.”

Some black leaders are still acting as Judas goats today. LifeSiteNews cites black pro-life activist Ryan Bomberger: “Back in 2005, the NAACP praised the high black abortion rate as compared to the percentage of the population at a NARAL fundraising gala. When more black babies are aborted than are born alive in NYC and the NAACP responds by supporting Gov. [Andrew] Cuomo’s radical abortion expansion via the misnamed ‘Women’s Equality Act,’ one can understand how the targeting of minorities continues unabated.”

• J. Kenneth Blackwell is a policy board member of the American Civil Rights Union.

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME

Monday, January 26, 2015

Abortion and the man. A research study

Riv Patol Nerv Ment. 1983 Nov-Dec;104(6):255-68.
[Abortion and the man. Psychological and psychopathological manifestations in the face of lost fatherhood].

Benvenuti P, Borri P, Buzzoni P, Clerici L, Rossi Monti M.


This study examines the psychological and psychopathological reactions that may appear in a man when his partner aborts. The small amount of literature that exists on the subjects was examined, and several men were, interviewed at the time their partners aborted voluntarely [sic]. It turns out that in spite of the man's lack of recognition of any reactions (reinforced by current attitudes and by the scant psychological and medical interest in the subject), there is considerable emotional involvement in the lost parenthood, both for the man and the woman. As revealed by the interviews, this involvement may manifest itself in persecutory or depressive anxiety and psychosomatic symptoms. Moreover, but very rarely, real and typical psychopathological symptoms may appear, such as depression and behavioural disorders. The appearance of these reactions is linked to the problems and conflicts aroused by prospective fatherhood, leading to a comparison between the experiences of fuliwed fatherhood and those of fatherhood lost.

PMID: 6543986 [PubMed - indexed for MEDLINE]

0 comment(s): (ANONYMOUS ok -but mind our rules, please)                                      << HOME