In the January/February '06 issue of the Priests for Life newsletter, there's a good, short article on Marriage Preparation and Abortion by Kevin and Theresa Burke.
Marriage preparation is a time of great joy and excitement for young couples as they prepare for their special day. Unfortunately abortion is one topic that will not likely come up in meetings with their priest/deacon or in their Pre-Cana class. This can have tragic consequences because without healing, post abortion issues have the potential to become a silent ticking time bomb in a marriage. Given the prevalence of abortion, we know that many of these couples participated in the abortion of a child prior to meeting their future spouse, had an abortion during the engagement-dating period or may have an abortion after they are married.
Abortion creates a relational and spiritual wound. A healthy marital relationship is marked by a deep bonding between husband and wife with a foundational trust that leads to vibrant and satisfying emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy. Abortion is a traumatic death experience that is closely associated to relational/sexual intimacy creating a profound fracture of trust striking at the heart of the marital foundation (this holds true whether the event preceded a marriage, or was experienced by only one spouse.) Partners experience unresolved, unspoken grief and shame as they struggle with depression, anxiety, and other pain numbing symptoms of trauma that can negatively impact marriage and family life. Extra marital affairs are not uncommon for persons with abortion in their history.