an After abortion

REAL, CONFIDENTIAL, FREE, NON-JUDGMENTAL HELP TO AVOID ABORTION, FROM MANY PLACES:
3,400 confidential and totally free groups to call and go to in the U.S...1,400 outside the U.S. . . . 98 of these in Canada.
Free, financial help given to women and families in need.More help given to women, families.
Helping with mortgage payments and more.More help.
The $1,950 need has been met!CPCs help women with groceries, clothing, cribs, "safe haven" places.
Help for those whose babies haveDown Syndrome and Other Birth Defects.
CALL 1-888-510-BABY or click on the picture on the left, if you gave birth or are about to and can't care for your baby, to give your baby to a worker at a nearby hospital (some states also include police stations or fire stations), NO QUESTIONS ASKED. YOU WON'T GET IN ANY TROUBLE or even have to tell your name; Safehaven people will help the baby be adopted and cared for.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

A reader in Singapore sends us this link:

He wanted to marry girlfriend, he wanted to keep the baby, but boyfriend had...no right to fight abortion.

He wanted the girl and the baby, she didn't want him or the baby. Her parents didn't want him or the baby, either. The baby was five months along.

When I read articles like this one, my gut-level reaction to the man is often not one of sympathy. It seems from the article that he reacted with shocked self-absorption when he first heard of the pregnancy. And if he wanted to protect and nurture his child, why didn't he think about that before having sex with someone to whom he was not married, whose parents did not like him, and who, if asked, probably could have told him she didn't object to abortion and wasn't prepared to carry a pregnancy to term?

To a certain extent, also, this man and other men in this position sometimes come across as wanting the baby not so much for the sake of the child but more because it helps them gain continued access to their girlfriend. The sad emotions seem, to me, to be tinged with a certain degree of self-pity over what amounts to a huge rejection from the former girlfried, as opposed to a focus on the loss of their child.

I guess who I feel most sorry for is the baby.

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